Pregnancy Thus Far

Hilarious

I want to know where you were when the Earthquake hit six days ago. If you’re wondering where I was, it was on the toilet. Of course. Pregnant people pee every twenty minutes; even at night, we stumble on creaky floors, crash into walls, mumble indecipherable phrases in our sleep on our way to the loo.

Also, my body is currently producing colostrum. I do not think the road to milk chest status is a beautiful miracle. I think its weird. These are conversations I usually reserve for my single friends and my husband, but I figure, what the heck, you all need to know the truth. Tell the truth. Shame the devil.

Crazy eye

I know we posted the cute pic of me and the peach, but here’s how it really went that day: Bedtime was rapidly approaching (7:30pm) and I was busy pinning maternity outfits and eating Sunspire chips (fake M&Ms AKA grain sweetened chocolate that can only be loved once your tastebuds have been starved for close to a decade). That’s when my husband took a photo of me and I gave him the look of death that clearly communicated, “Don’t take this – I have let the baby hang out, I am enjoying my life, eating something besides saltines and you are messing with my quiet time.”

By the way, even though I am still working out, I apparently cannot breathe once I have walked up one flight of stairs. That’s right, one flight. Please reserve your judgement when you see me at the elevator. I know if you don’t see me every day, you might not realize I am growing a human, but I am, and our now-avocado-size-baby, makes Mama out of breath.

Then there’s the issue of caring less about personal hygiene and more about sleeping.

No Shower

Lest you think I don’t love carrying my Baby Daddy’s Baby, I do.

We are ridiculously excited, thanking God all the time for this opportunity, laughing hysterically at everything happening to my body (and other unmentionables like when I punched my pillow in my sleep and said, “IT’S SO HARD!” and laid back down again). I call Cody every day when someone else at the grocery store generously shares their OPINION ON EVERYTHING ABOUT PREGNANCY or THEIR UNSOLICITED TORTUROUS BIRTH STORY. My friends have made pregnancy fun as well, sharing their clothes, desired opinions, solicited stories, food, gym time, couch time, books and more.

To close on my pregnancy thus far, a fun list of baby’s womb accomplishments:

  • Missions Trip to Mexico (before we knew we were pregnant, which explains the two bags of trail mix I, ahem, handled during the drive)
  • Christmas in Texas (the start of the normally hated, suddenly loved croissant obsession that would trigger us to think we were pregnant)
  • Moving into our first home (explains the nausea that I attributed to extreme exhaustion)
  • Working out with the ladies at Union Rescue Mission (“I want a Beyonce Booty…” fav quote of the year)
  • Lots of Cross Fit with a side of Pilates
  • Lots of Outreach with Mama
  • Read all 3 Divergent novels & saw the movie (WHAT’S UP WITH EDWARD NOT LOSING AN EYE?!)
  • Baptized three people
  • Attended the Justice Conference & agreed with Mommy and Daddy that it was time to start a prison ministry
  • Laughed lots in church
  • Played behind Mama’s belly button making it stick out freakishly
  • Already been spoiled rotten by Grandparents
  • Loved fiercely by parents
  • Been very busy being created and purposed by God

Can’t wait to meet this sweet little baby!  Thank you for letting me share ;)… All our love to you and yours!

 

 

 

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